HAVE YOU EVER FELT LIKE DYING AFTER LOSING SOMEONE?

Have you ever felt like dying after losing someone? Have you ever wondered if you will ever feel better? Have you ever wished you could trade places because it is far more painful to have to deal with grief than death itself. Unless you have gone through the pits of darkness and sorrow in those moments where the world had just blacked-out on you when that loved one dies, you will not know what I mean.

You will have no words to describe all that is going on inside your head. Every single experience that you quote when someone asks how you are may only make up a tiny fraction of everything else that is screaming from inside of you.

All of a sudden, nothing seems to matter.  The days ahead seem like a long intimidating road and you truly believe you can't make it alone for the rest of your own journey. 

Everything in your head seemed to have come to a stop. Like a complete standstill in the middle of a massive traffic jam. You can't think or even make an apparently simple decision.  So you still decide what he or she would have liked it done if they were still here with you.

You may even feel a sense of impending chaos seeking to threaten in crushing you under the weight of it all. Don't be intimidated. Start with a task and then brave it through one by one. Every simple task which you undertake will take you further away from the first one. 

Ignore opinions of people around you as you go through your own process of grief. No one but you alone knows how it is to be you and grieve for someone you love. Every grief is personal and has its own rhythm of pain and healing. 

Each life story shared with the spouse is unique. Thus, not even another widow or widower may feel the same intensity. Forgive them for they know not what they are saying.

Take your time. Listen to the birds. Stare deep into the greens of nature and return the smiles to those blooms that greet you. Plunge into the rivers of peace from God above. When nothing else makes sense, think nothing more of it. Like a child, learn to lean on the One who holds your breath and knows the number of your days. Each day will bring you closer to the promise that everything will get better because you survived.

Silver